darlingyo

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Today, soccer coach talked to me awhile halfway the training. He asked me whether I wanna play for next year match. Sighs. I really don't know lar. The competition will clash with Common test next year. During term 2 & 3. Moreover, all the study plans will be gone. Trainings training till prelims lar. I fucking hate this. He asked whether mummy will let not. I don't know what to say to him.

I want to go because I don't wanna give up like this. On the other hand, I don't wanna regret all my life if my results will go down the hill like this. I want to come back TJ next next year smiling or crying with joy. Seriously, even if people say "U must try to cope". Hello, Everyone is different and I am not you. Neither you are me. So don't assume everyone can do it. I DON'T have your special ability. I will just go so weak after all the tough trainings and you expect me to study and revise. I don't have superwoman ability. I don't know what I should say. I told him I will try my best but if my results are not up to my expectations then I won't continue. Oh ya, the way he asked me is equilvalent to not asking. He don't allow me to say No anyway. Just trying to make me nod my head and agree with him.

Anyway, the fucking soccer committee must be sick in the mind. They arranged the matches during important exams period. Like wad the hell ok. I supposed they only can kick balls but not use their brains. And this idiot wanna put J2 in. He's another....elohssa. AHHHH. I hope I can be smarter and can multi task. WHY can't I have that concentration?!! God please let me excel and not be a piece of slackish shit. I don't wanna let mummy, daddy and grandma down. I want to let them be proud of my A's results =(

I miss ya.

12:04 AM 0 ♫